The Unskilled Sommelier

This entry will be brief and painful. I stumbled onto my first really, really, REALLY bad wine experience. I think I might have been as disappointed as I was because the bottle was unique. It was the third bottle I purchased the first night of this wine journey, and I had been saving it for a special occasion.

That special occasion ended up being a crappy Tuesday night full of rain and residual stress from the work day. What better pick me up than an entire bottle of wine? That's common sense, in my opinion.

The culprit was a bottle of Lucky Duck Shiraz wine from Walmart.

Seems innocent enough, right? I liked that the duck was upside down on the bottle, that the price was great, and it was from Australia which I thought was unique. It was also a Shiraz, which is the most heavily produced type of wine in Australia. I figured it would be a win, just like the Beringer from a few weeks past.

Boy, oh boy, was I wrong.

Shiraz is another name for the Syrrah grape, which is a red grape that's deeply impacted by the climate in which it is grown. That means that you can drink 10 different Shiraz wines and experience 10 different flavors. They are typically spicy, with a rich plum or blackberry flavor, but sometimes you get a hint of coffee or licorice...I actually had one from the World Market that tasted a bit like chocolate. They can be very dry or smooth, and are always exotic. Australian Shiraz wines tend to be fruitier, pairing well with a red meat.

Let me tell you what they don't pair well with. Heidi on her red couch.

It tasted like rancid cranberry juice. My mouth puckered, and I could not get the taste out of the roof of my mouth. Determined, I took just a sip, then a gulp - hoping that different amounts of wine in my mouth would change up which taste buds were being hit and make the flavor a little more agreeable. Survey says: Nope.

I tried it cold. I tried it at room temperature. I tried it with a mouthful of strawberry-flavored marshmallows. You cannot make this wine taste good. Do not. PLEASE do not drink this wine.

One notable feature about this wine is that it haunts you. Some might call this a good thing, but it seriously bothered me. I sneezed the next day and tasted it. And only one cup (if that) later, and I was so drunk I slept like a spasm-gripped epileptic. This was my bed the next day.

I truly think the people of Australia are laughing at us. The label exclaimed: Lucky You!

Yeah. Lucky me. This luck isn't going to be a lady if she ever meets an Australian wine maker. Or a duck with an australian accent. Or a man holding a wine glass who says the words "down" or "under". I'll find a way to get them, one day soon.

So, a ton of time has passed. Apologies! I'm a procrastinator and busy and blah blah blah. The goal here is to post a couple today to get us up to date on my wine-o journey. So pop a cork, pour something burgundy into a cup, and enjoy.

It turned out that Judy had already seen it with Richard some time in the past, but that didn't stop us from enjoying every 19th century romantically tense moment of it. Once Judy gripped the chair and mimicked Mr. Darcy, her husband Richard quickly got out of there and left us to our giggles. It really was a blast.

Our refreshments: I think I just wasn't sure on the flavor, since Amanda is not a wine-o like me. Instead, we picked a much safer bottle all around - Blue Sky Concord. I figured it would taste like communion, a flavor that holds fond memories for Amanda. Who doesn't like grapes?


I wasn't familiar with the label, and honestly I don't remember where Judy said she got it. My extensive research (which consisted of typing "Blue Sky Wine" in Google) says the company is based in Illinois. This weekend they're having a Reds, Whites, and Blues Jazz event at their vineyard - ummm sorry I didn't tell you in time. :) You could make it if you left right now, maybe, but who would want to stop in the middle of Heidi's blog entry for anything short of a stroke or an episode of Clarissa Explains It All? And Melissa Joan Hart, you didn't explain it all. I've been waiting for an explanation regarding your decision to take on Sabrina the Teenage Witch since 1996.

The wine was of course delicious. It's definitely a dessert wine, with a thick sweet taste that lingers in your mouth minutes after you swallow. It has a bit of a tinny aftertaste, which is pretty common with most wine I think, but the whole experience far outweighs that one downfall. It has a seductive red/purple color - yes, I think color connotes emotion - and it actually went wonderfully with our popcorn. I think it would go well with most anything. If you're not sure about wine, I'd definitely choose a concord to begin. You can buy this specific concord online for about $10.


I also like that the bottles are blue and the cork and glasses are branded. They make for good collector's pieces, and display well. And I just sounded totally Martha Stewart, didn't I? I guess I own it.

As a side note, there are biblical reasons why we drink wine at communion, although I think the choosing of Concord is more preference than biblically backed. The Bible tells us that God made wine to be used in the celebration of the gifts he has given us - it is mentioned in most every feast mentioned in the Bible, is what Jesus turned the water into, is taken away as punishment in the Bible, and so on. The wine resembles Christ's blood, the nature of wine's elements give the beverage power (just as there is power in the blood), and wine "gladdens the hearts of man". It isn't just an excuse for Pastor's to hiccup in their robe closets. I've always grown up in churches that use grape juice instead of wine, and I wondered about that. From what i can tell, it really was a trend between the early 1980's to just recently for churches to switch to juice. (Again, this is not a scholarly discovery here people - Google is my friend).) Just some interesting "didja knows" for the road.

So, the Concord gets a thumbs up for sure. Reasonably priced, super sweet flavor, goes great with historical romantic movies and good times with good friends. Let me know what you think if you try a Concord - and if you buy the Blue Sky demon-child Mysterioso, please do not bring it over!